A drunk staggers out of a bar and runs into two priests He goes over to the first priest and says, “Dude, I’m Jesus Christ!” And...
A guy spots a sign outside a house that reads. “Talking Dog for Sale.” Intrigued, he walks in. “So what have you done with your life?”...
There was a plane and it had 5 people in it: a president, a lawyer, a young teenage boy, a priest and a blonde girl. The...
Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious looking bear. The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started...
A man walks into a bar and sits down. He asks the bartender, “Can I have a cigarette?” The bartender replies, “Sure, the cigarette machine is...
A man and a woman are sleeping together when suddenly there is a noise in the house, and the woman rolls over and says, “It’s my...
A wife comes home late one night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket, she sees four legs instead of just...
There are three friends named Mad, Brain, and Fight. One day Fight went missing and his friends Mad and Brain started searching for him. Then Brain...
A woman is at a grocery store. She goes to the clerk to purchase her groceries. The clerk looks at her items and sees a carton...
Bob goes to see his friend Pete. He finds Pete in his barn dancing bared around his John Deere. “What are you doing!” asks Bob. Pete...
One day a duck walks in a store and ask the manager if they sell grapes. The manager says, “No, we don’t sell grapes.” The duck...
Tom was at the hospital visiting with his best friend Larry who was dying. Tom asked, “If there is baseball in heaven will you come back...
Paddy and Murphy are having’ a pint in the pub. When some scuba divers come on the TV. Paddy says, “Murphy, why is it them deep...
A Spanish captain was walking on his ship when a soldier rushes to him and exclaims, “An enemy ship is approaching us!” The captain replies calmly,...
A man was driving and saw a truck stalled on the side of the highway that had ten penguins standing next to it. The man pulled...
A man went to his lawyer and told him, “My neighbor owes me $500 and he won’t pay up. What should I do?” “Do you have...