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I walked into a coffee shop on Halloween to find the woman behind the counter with a bunch of sponges pinned to her uniform. “I’m assuming...
A man has been in hospital for a month. One day, he’s so sick and tired of being in hospital that he sneaks out and down...
A young seminary student went home for Christmas break. A horrible snowstorm stranded the regular minister in another town. The leaders of the congregation asked the...
At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. “Isn’t it true,” he bellowed, “that you accepted five thousand dollars to...
While suturing up a cut on the hand of a 75 year old farmer, whose hand had been caught in the gate while working his cattle,...
While the pope was visiting the USA, he told the driver of his limo that he has the sudden urge to drive. The driver was a...
Jim was annoyed when his blonde wife told him that a car had backed into her, damaging a fender, and that she hadn’t gotten the license...
Three police officers were standing in line at the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter asked the first officer, “What did you do with your life?” “I was...
A boy who was a witness to a crime was called to testify in court. He was approached by the defense attorney who asked, “Did anyone...
A blonde walks into the library. She walks up to the counter, slams a book down and screams at the librarian, “This is the worst book...
Three old timers at the retirement home were complaining about growing old. The first one says, “I wake up at 7:00 AM and try for a...
Two Irishmen friends are drinking together at one of their homes. One friend takes out a bottle of Irish whiskey and asks the other, “Will you...
A mother tells her little boy “Johnny, you mustn’t eat too many lollies or I’ll hide the lolly jar.” Johnny asks, “Why?” His mother says, “Because...
An old man goes into the Social Security Office and fills out an application. Too old to have a birth certificate, he is asked to prove...
Two mental patients were walking next to a swimming pool. One jumped into the pool and the other jumped in to save him. Their doctor saw...
Little Johnny came home from school and heard the word “b***tch.” He asks his mom what the word meant and she responds, “It means priest.” The...
