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An elderly ladies were sitting in a park every day. A man is observing them daily as they talk and laugh loudly. One day he observed...
A guy finds an old bottle and rubs it and suddenly a genie pops out and announces, “You have 3 wishes, speak your first.” The guy...
The Harvey comes home late at night, drunk as a skunk. He staggers into the bedroom and wakes his sleeping wife, “Ellie, wake up! You’ll never...
Two teenagers, Fred and Joe, meet after school, and Fred is all excited. “Man, I was at the most awesome party this weekend! We went to...
Two drunken Irishmen, Paddy and Mick, are wandering through a graveyard. Paddy starts reading the gravestones and says, “Mick, would you look at this? A fella...
Two guys are out hunting in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t appear to be breathing, his eyes are glazed over. The other...
Little Johnny asks his father: “Where does the wind come from?” “I don’t know.” “Why do dogs bark?” “I don’t know.” “Why is the earth round?”...
A guest calls the waiter: “Please try my soup.” Waiter: “What’s the problem? Too salty?” Guest: “No. Just try my soup.” Waiter: “What then, is it...
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He...
A very elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary. The old man leans forward and says softly to his wife,...
A driver is pulled over by a policeman. The policeman approaches the driver’s door. ‘Is there a problem, officer?’ ‘You were speeding, sir. Can I see...
A man had been drinking at a pub all evening, and by the time the bartender rang for final orders, he was totally laddered. He stood...
A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink...
Two friends were playing golf. On the tee, Jack hit his shot way left of the fairway into some buttercups. Bob proceeded to hit his shot,...
A blind man walks into a restaurant and takes a seat. The owner, who’s also the waiter, hands him a menu. The man kindly says, “I’m...
An elderly man had owned his large farm in Louisiana for many years. Right at the back of the farm, there was a large pond that...
